tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-68085319886234477252024-02-08T11:05:26.171+10:30Willow ThomasThis is a blog of a woman survivor of Child sexual abuse and depression. I am not just a Survivor I am now a THRIVER!Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.comBlogger104125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-89795934485389014252018-03-29T12:29:00.000+10:302018-03-29T12:31:05.046+10:30Booklets for sale.<br />
Hi all just to let you know that I am selling the rest of the booklets on E bay for $5 including postage within Australia.<br />
<br />
Just click the link below.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.ebay.com.au/itm/Falling-or-Flying-Breaking-free-after-childhood-sexual-abuse/162967052489?epid=5017219914&hash=item25f197e0c9:g:jPgAAOSwNaRaud9j" target="_blank">https://www.ebay.com.au/itm/Falling-or-Flying-Breaking-free-after-childhood-sexual-abuse/162967052489?epid=5017219914&hash=item25f197e0c9:g:jPgAAOSwNaRaud9j</a><br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGKj7y9vJQIz9B-_tD5_27AYV1fyr_6WiySHwEroewIeKxNBgD6hAXj_UMz2naCtOWXjCiNfruSJmTlJO8h_GNdU-OmH_0WSsHzwO6MsOBy64HYe7tOkQVHnBlvuYswPwjGShFrh58wxA/s1600/falling+or+flying+booklets.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="852" data-original-width="1008" height="270" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGKj7y9vJQIz9B-_tD5_27AYV1fyr_6WiySHwEroewIeKxNBgD6hAXj_UMz2naCtOWXjCiNfruSJmTlJO8h_GNdU-OmH_0WSsHzwO6MsOBy64HYe7tOkQVHnBlvuYswPwjGShFrh58wxA/s320/falling+or+flying+booklets.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Wishing you all ,<br />
Love and light,<br />
WillowWillow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-19965375703789157142017-07-11T16:06:00.001+09:302017-07-11T16:06:16.235+09:30Coral Anika Theill needs our support!<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: blue; font-size: x-large;">Coral needs our support! </span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<b><span style="color: blue; font-size: x-large;">(Trigger warning)</span><span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-size: large;">I am writing this to
bring to your attention the horrible injustice that Coral Anika Theill is
suffering and has suffered for most of her life. Her story would make a movie it is so crazy
and in this time of history you would think impossible to still be happening to
women.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><span style="font-size: large;">I have found her to
be an inspirational and courageous woman, whom I am so grateful to have made
contact with. She is an incredible woman who is a warrior for other survivors
of abuse and other mothers who have had their children taken from them for no
good reason.<o:p></o:p></span></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">This is her story in brief….<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Raped as a child, married a fundamentalist Christian only to
be locked in a Domestic violence situation with added Spiritual abuse. Tortured and after fleeing the situation had
her children removed from her, one was still being breastfed! <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">She has had all rights removed to see any of her 8 children!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Coral’s ex-husband Mr Marty Warner who is a very wealthy man
has used his wealth and situation of power to make life hell for Coral Anika
Theill! He has been able to use the court system which seems to be inherently
Patriarchal to take the children away and then claim child support from her
whilst she was disabled and poor. She has no money for an attorney so he has
been able to just do what he likes to her.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">She still lives in poor health and in poverty. She wrote a
book about her story which includes lots of supporting legal documents. It is called “<i><span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif;">BONSHEÁ Making Light of the Dark”</span></i><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">She has now had her passport revoked, her only connection to her family in Denmark. The system has been used and abused against
her:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Quote from Coral:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; padding: 0cm; text-decoration-line: none;">"Since 1999 I have lived under a state
address protection program from my ex-husband</span><span style="border: none windowtext 1.0pt; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; padding: 0cm;">.</span><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;"><span style="border: none windowtext 1.0pt; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; padding: 0cm;">This
past month I learned that my passport was revoked
due to my wealthy ex-husband and his attorney suing me in 1999 for twice
of what I earn as a disabled woman for child support of my eight
children. I was <b>not</b> informed of
this hearing.</span><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><span style="border: none windowtext 1.0pt; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; padding: 0cm;"><span style="color: blue;">In
2003 Judge Paula Brownhill added $2,000 more to this judgment even though I had
already paid the child support. She would not listen to me in court.
In 2006 I was sued for interest on this judgment at a hearing I could
not attend due to poverty. Ten years later, the State of Oregon removed the
$2,000 from my child support judgment. To date, I owe $3,815.74, due to
interest being added to this fraudulent child support judgment.” </span> </span><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<b><span style="border: none windowtext 1.0pt; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; padding: 0cm;"><span style="font-size: large;">To top it off she has just
found out the state is about to start garnishing the amount slowly from her
poverty income. The amount taken will
mean she has no food money!<o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: none windowtext 1.0pt; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; mso-border-alt: none windowtext 0cm; padding: 0cm;"><span style="font-size: large;">To
read more here is the link:<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://www.coralanikatheill.com/single-post/2017/07/06/Support-Coral-Anika-Theills-Emancipation-Escaped-Hunted"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">https://www.coralanikatheill.com/single-post/2017/07/06/Support-Coral-Anika-Theills-Emancipation-Escaped-Hunted</span></a><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">I
realise she lives in the USA but where ever someone lives they do not deserve
this kind of treatment. It is draconian!!!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">You can
help by writing to ask that Mr Marty Warner to sign “The Satisfaction of
support” form to free her from this ridiculous debt!<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">Mr
Marty Warner<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">8700
Fruit Farm Road, Independence, Oregon 97351<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">Phone
(503) 838-1662<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">Here is an affidavit from someone else that describes what her ex husband is like:</span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<a href="http://coralanikatheill.blogspot.com.au/2011/10/coral-anika-theill.html" style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">http://coralanikatheill.blogspot.com.au/2011/10/coral-anika-theill.html</a></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Here is
a link to more information and people you can contact for her.</span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://www.coralanikatheill.com/single-post/2017/07/06/Support-Coral-Anika-Theills-Emancipation-Escaped-Hunted"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">https://www.coralanikatheill.com/single-post/2017/07/06/Support-Coral-Anika-Theills-Emancipation-Escaped-Hunted</span></a><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">Here is
a link to her website which also has a Complimentary copy of her book.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://www.coralanikatheill.com/"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";">https://www.coralanikatheill.com/</span></a><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">If you
can do nothing more, please share this around to as many people as you can.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">If you
can do more such as take it to the media or help in any other way please
contact me by sending a message and I will pass it on to Coral.<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">Love
and Light,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;">Willow
Thomas <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0SM8bN4GNYlsH6mbx7UCC0-PI1yuxDl0qjtXLeqQ97ebKRw66-IF_88TB8aDiQjvszs1U9l69w8YfbGy_GFQ6sacK1m9sotAMF98Ja0oNKXnQnM2dobher_w8vP75qrVnUuYD4GYQzWY/s1600/Coral%2527s+book.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0SM8bN4GNYlsH6mbx7UCC0-PI1yuxDl0qjtXLeqQ97ebKRw66-IF_88TB8aDiQjvszs1U9l69w8YfbGy_GFQ6sacK1m9sotAMF98Ja0oNKXnQnM2dobher_w8vP75qrVnUuYD4GYQzWY/s320/Coral%2527s+book.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif";"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="font8" style="margin-bottom: .0001pt; margin: 0cm; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<br /></div>
Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-55940759979483276282016-10-27T18:10:00.000+10:302016-10-27T18:10:55.324+10:30Willow's Forest of Thoughts. Being a survivor of family abuse.<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/P3gSCvlXn8o" width="480"></iframe>Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-67213342728280008272016-10-11T17:54:00.001+10:302016-10-11T17:54:56.877+10:30Willow's Forest of Thoughts. Self love for healing.<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/_nZeKD5fzg0" width="480"></iframe><br />
<br />
Grab a cup of tea and join me as I talk about what has helped me focus in on self love.<br />
Curiosity and Play!<br />
<br />
Love and light ,<br />
WillowWillow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-87103156638518425622016-09-23T17:26:00.002+09:302016-09-23T17:26:40.999+09:30Willow's Forest of Thoughts. Re-victimization . Don't give up!<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/NveaxuMNCEY" width="480"></iframe><br />
<br />
<br />
My thoughts on being re-victimized.<br />
Just remember the perpetrator is 100% to blame!<br />
Love and light<br />
WillowWillow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-17622901002486808492016-09-19T17:13:00.000+09:302016-09-19T17:13:26.829+09:30Willow's Forest of Thoughts. "We have been silent too long."<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/VTOkqVHsWwA" width="480"></iframe>Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-54569085043129695002016-09-09T22:13:00.000+09:302016-09-09T22:13:05.849+09:30Willow's Forest of Thoughts. My first Vlog on my Youtube channel.<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/qcrBqg8SRHo" width="480"></iframe>Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-80542885796456616022016-09-08T16:54:00.001+09:302016-09-08T16:54:07.754+09:30Self Love #SelfLoveStoriesHi all,<br />
It has been a while since I have blogged.<br />
<br />
I am a little excited at the moment because a person I subscribe to on You Tube is doing her 3rd Self Love September!<br />
<br />
Her name is Kelly-Ann Maddox, she is a spiritual counselor with a twist. I love her work as it has inspired me so much.<br />
<br />
As a survivor of Childhood sexual abuse, self love is very hard. Self loathing is instilled at a young age. It is a big battle to change.<br />
<br />
When I reached my late 40's I got to a point where I really challenged my parents on what had happened. It was also the first time I really wrote everything down.<br />
Well it was a huge turning point in my healing journey. I had a break down or as I now like to call it a Break through! <br />
I made some major changes in my life for ME!<br />
<br />
I broke up with my family as their toxicity and denial of the repercussions were not a very safe place for healing.<br />
<br />
I was raised a Christian and became an atheist. I didn't stop there though, I went on an exciting spiritual journey looking at every thing I had been told to be afraid of. I faced the demons and found they were lies, there was beauty , freedom, self empowerment and self love.<br />
<br />
Through this hard journey I have learned that I am worth listening to and that it is important for me to listen to my internal voice. The true beautiful quiet one that speaks when I sit in stillness not the echoes of negative talk that run rampant in my mind.<br />
<br />
I got the courage to legally change my birth name and it was so freeing!<br />
<br />
I am not saying it is easy and I am by no means finished but what I am saying is that Self Love is a very important part of healing. Learning to love ourselves is the first step!<br />
<br />
I went from a person who couldn't stand being alone to someone who loves to spend time with myself.<br />
<br />
We need to encourage each other regularly to take this journey, challenge those self loathing thoughts as they are lies! When they start to get you down, don't tell yourself off but be kind to yourself. Treat yourself as you would treat a good friend because you are your best friend for life.<br />
<br />
Every single person on the planet is here for a reason, we all have a part to play, we all need to love ourselves so that we can in turn love others. It will be a much better place.<br />
<br />
If you want to check out Kelly-Ann Maddox click on the link below.<br />
<br />
<a href="https://youtu.be/qI6DWaqeybk?list=PLH1DuMfxSE8gxutM1MXIKVtvI0H8dVB_n" target="_blank">Kelly-Ann Maddox Self Love September</a><br />
<br />
Much Self Love and Light on your journey,<br />
Willow Thomas<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrxeE3JD1SZtJTGu_ARkAmI6I6atvMbZN43GZOCSjH33n5VjWq7MMfPbDgqPmmVP7Ysgym0uwkkhi0D8JK5xYyGc8aEytXTKcrpthExFCMr0SY8a_xJDK8r8rqTdtcjF8-PsOfiSiGVK4/s1600/from+I+phone+002.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrxeE3JD1SZtJTGu_ARkAmI6I6atvMbZN43GZOCSjH33n5VjWq7MMfPbDgqPmmVP7Ysgym0uwkkhi0D8JK5xYyGc8aEytXTKcrpthExFCMr0SY8a_xJDK8r8rqTdtcjF8-PsOfiSiGVK4/s320/from+I+phone+002.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-56643129634195644432016-07-21T16:50:00.000+09:302016-07-21T16:50:00.202+09:30Justice for women and Children: Our terrorist problem has nothing to do with Muslims.<span style="font-size: large;">With an average of ONE ( closer to 2) women a WEEK being murdered by a partner or ex partner here in Australia you would think there would be some great support systems in place. You would think that the Family Court system would be a place of Justice for women and children who have been living in a Domestic Violent situation.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Unfortunately this is not what I have seen over the past few months but instead some terrible treatment of mothers.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Rosie Batty here in Australia spoke at the National Press Club earlier this year about the plight of women in domestic violence.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">She has a Website called "Never Alone" Luke Batty Foundation. Calling on reform in the family courts.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Please check out her website.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.neveralone.com.au/" target="_blank">http://www.neveralone.com.au/</a></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">What has been happening is if they have split with their partners and go to court for custody etc they end up being re-victimised again. A lot of women in domestic violent relationships who report that their partners have sexually abused the children, hoping to keep them safe, are made to give the custody of the children to their abusers. It's a complicated mess but it is suggested to these women not to bring these sorts of things up in court because it will make their case harder.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Here is a link to her speech at the National Press club:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.neveralone.com.au/rosie-press-club" target="_blank">http://www.neveralone.com.au/rosie-press-club</a></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Here is an excerpt from her speech.</span><br />
<br />
<div style="background-color: #fefefe; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Lato, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;">"The problem is not in the Family Law Act – it is in the very culture of the family law system that has the responsibility to apply it.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: #fefefe; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Lato, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;">To prioritise the safety of children, the family law system needs to believe that family violence has occurred. All too often, survivors even with proof have their fears written off as anxiety or obsession. Minimised or dismissed. Accused of exaggerating or manipulating the system.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: #fefefe; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Lato, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;">Children who say they are afraid, or bravely disclose their own abuse, are routinely seen as having had their minds influenced and poisoned by their mother’s animosity towards the father and are not believed.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: #fefefe; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Lato, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;">The court can then order these very same children to continue to spend time with, or even live with, the alleged abuser – a truly diabolical and unacceptable situation. "</span></div>
<div style="background-color: #fefefe; box-sizing: border-box; color: #484848; font-family: Lato, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="background-color: #fefefe; box-sizing: border-box; color: #484848; font-family: Lato, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="font-size: large;">In America this is also a problem. Coral Anika Theill has had a horrific life filled with abuse by family, church and the Justice system. Please read her "Wall of Shame" article.</span></div>
<div style="background-color: #fefefe; box-sizing: border-box; color: #484848; font-family: Lato, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Here is an excerpt:</span></div>
<div style="background-color: #fefefe; box-sizing: border-box; font-family: Lato, Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; line-height: 24px;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="font_8" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Basic, sans-serif; font-stretch: normal; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: center; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-weight: bold; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-family: arial, "ms pゴシック", "ms pgothic", 돋움, dotum, helvetica, sans-serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: blue; font-size: large;">"Domestic violence is a complex problem with roots in an oppressively hierarchical, patriarchal violence-accepting society.</span></span></span></span></div>
<div class="font_8" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Basic, sans-serif; font-stretch: normal; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;"><br /><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: arial, "ms pゴシック", "ms pgothic", 돋움, dotum, helvetica, sans-serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">For nearly twenty years, I was married to a man who ruled his household with absolute authority. His personal justification for his behavior came from Biblical scripture. During the course of our marriage, I bore him eight children. My firstborn children were identical twin girls. I also suffered three miscarriages. I home schooled the oldest children for several years, renovated three houses, baked, canned, gardened, etc. <span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline;"><a href="http://www.coralanikatheill.com/#!Spiritual-Abuse-Bondage-Marks-of-a-Christian-Cult/c1q8z/571d18eb0cf269c350ee6338" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; cursor: pointer; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">I was treated as a possession (slave). In the course of my marriage I was drawn, against my will, into numerous extreme fundamental churches and cults which emphasized patriarchal authority and the obedience of women.</a>"</span></span></span></span></div>
<div class="font_8" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Basic, sans-serif; font-stretch: normal; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-align: justify; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="color: blue; font-size: large;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: arial, "ms pゴシック", "ms pgothic", 돋움, dotum, helvetica, sans-serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-size: large;">The system let her down, she lost custody of all her 8 Children! Something a mother will never get over! She had so much proof and witnesses but the system still did not protect her.<br /></span><span style="font-size: large;">Here is the link:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.coralanikatheill.com/#!WALL-OF-SHAME-Marty-Warner-the-Pastors-Christians-Ministries-Who-Support-Him/c1q8z/573e48b50cf2f90ca6f79698" target="_blank">http://www.coralanikatheill.com/#!WALL-OF-SHAME-Marty-Warner-the-Pastors-Christians-Ministries-Who-Support-Him/c1q8z/573e48b50cf2f90ca6f79698</a></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">You can see Coral Anika Theill interviewed about her life by Geerte Frenken on the link below. It does go for over an hour but if you have the time it is worth watching!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://consciousconsumernetwork.tv/geerte-frenken-talks-coral-anika-theill/" target="_blank">https://consciousconsumernetwork.tv/geerte-frenken-talks-coral-anika-theill/</a></span><br />
<br />
<br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Here we are all worried about terrorism from Muslims who have been tainted by the extremists that call themselves Muslims. With 99% of Muslims wanting to live peacefully and safely here in Australia.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"> I think the more important problem in our society is the mistreatment of women and children, and the lack of Justice! That is Terrorism at home!</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Let's stand with these women and children and ask for Justice and safety, which are basic human rights.</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">You can join Rosie Batty's campaign on her website "Never Alone"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-size: large;">Sending out love and light,</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;">Willow Thomas</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJgS7bUGJB9unKc3mjn7pHWBqgWBN37MvYl4PSF2_fCnvfTRxaxBMsiRhOIykP1sbNDcNnT8qW-gUxjBatqGsVzfawAM3NV1ezedP3jzcbrypL5QBbMTne8Jznx5kiExRKtTIdZ_W_ams/s1600/Autmn+exquinox+and+more+009.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJgS7bUGJB9unKc3mjn7pHWBqgWBN37MvYl4PSF2_fCnvfTRxaxBMsiRhOIykP1sbNDcNnT8qW-gUxjBatqGsVzfawAM3NV1ezedP3jzcbrypL5QBbMTne8Jznx5kiExRKtTIdZ_W_ams/s320/Autmn+exquinox+and+more+009.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-57974165361207347302016-03-25T12:04:00.000+10:302016-03-25T12:04:16.929+10:30Your road trip to healing.....A letter to Adult survivors of Childhood sexual abuse.<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Dear Adult Survivor of childhood sexual abuse,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I don’t know what part of your healing journey you are on
but I hope you are at least starting to realise that the abuse is not your
fault. The perpetrator is 100% at fault.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">There are so many towns to visit on this journey,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Denial, (Shitty place but you think it looks just fine until
you get out of there!)<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Shock, Grief, Anger (sometimes called Outrage!), Self-Blame,
Shame, Depressed (not a pretty shade of blue either) and sometimes Suicidal,
hopefully that’s not your last stop. (I don’t recommend it.) <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">There are also lovely towns of Relief, Breaking free,
Self-Empowerment, New life, Self-discovery (The tours are really interesting!).<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Unfortunately the schedule is a little erratic; it’s not a
straight forward trip from Denial to New Life, it kind of goes back and forth
between the towns, especially with too many people trying to drive your car. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">It takes a while to get control back of the steering wheel
and put people in their places, after all this is YOUR journey not theirs!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Sometimes you get lucky and get a great navigator who
respects your decisions and just assists you with the tricky bits. If you find
one of those keep them. You may need a few backups too as it is a tiring job.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The people who are not so helpful are the ones who tell you
what you should do, as if they know your journey.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Here are some warning signs that they are not going to be
very helpful:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Just forgive the perpetrator and move on!” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Get over it!”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Are you still talking about that?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">“Was it really that bad?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I recommend that you drop them off at the next town and
leave them there<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Some people choose to stay away from your journey because
they don’t like to think about it or think about going on it with you. You may
be disappointed because you really wanted them to come for the drive but
believe me if they don’t want to come they won’t be much fun on the drive. It’s
a hard thing to let them go, remember to have a good cry about it and do a lot
of self-care to protect yourself. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Which reminds me; you should really take a First Aid kit
with you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">A Self-care package with things of your choice that may
include:</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
</div>
<ul>
<li><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Naps when you are tired.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Favourite foods, healthy and some treats too of course!</span></span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Drink plenty of water.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Time in nature, in a forest or by the beach.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Favourite safe people to chat to.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Favourite teddy or pet to cuddle when needed</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Inspiring books and music.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Read about other people who have made it through the journey,
it will be different for them but they may have some good advice.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="text-indent: -18pt;">Tell those negative voices to “F” off! And go and do
something nice for yourself.</span></span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Love, LOVE yourself you deserve it!</span></span></li>
<li><span style="text-indent: -18pt;"><span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Oh
and remember to have some fun along the way!</span></span></li>
</ul>
<br />
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The car you drive is not in perfect condition as it has
Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. The perpetrator did some nasty work on
it. So sometimes it plays up. The
nightmares and flashbacks of the abuse are horrible! It seems to make you time
travel right back to when it happened. The problem is very clever and manipulative. You
may end up with a lot of ill health mentally and physically. Unfortunately you
never really get rid of it completely but with regular services (counselling,
writing and practicing self-care and anything else positive that helps) you
will get a lot less trouble along the way.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Remember to stop driving and rest regularly, it’s too much
to try and do the journey quickly in one hit. Take as long as YOU need. Ask for
help and directions along the way. You will soon learn who you can trust and
who you cannot. Your inside “Warning
Bell” will go off time to time, LISTEN to it, you do actually know what’s right
for you. You just have to learn to trust yourself after everyone telling you
that you have no clue. They are wrong! And when your inside voice tells you
that it’s all going to work out fine, believe it, it will eventually and let’s
face it most of the fun of a journey is the travelling itself.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I know it’s not going to be easy but it will be worth it
because you are worth healing!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">You are the injured party not the injurer. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Speak out and tell your story because you own it and it may
help others on their journey too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Much love a fellow survivor who has visited most of those
towns and I promise it does get better! I also promise Denial is not all it’s
cut out to be.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Enjoy YOUR journey of self-discovery and healing.</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">Willow Thomas March 2016</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlHF5E6K8bOjB3BZpV6szyaknlA0xlAY0xkuymifgS39lYCyJOSZ3Re31ArJSMCVbY8TAl-blLfWxvjPYXALTbW7iHtN5vYh8BKREItoHADkQdglc1Mbb1vqmAEeFpt6vA-CpEM3uvcKM/s1600/from+new+iphone+064.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjlHF5E6K8bOjB3BZpV6szyaknlA0xlAY0xkuymifgS39lYCyJOSZ3Re31ArJSMCVbY8TAl-blLfWxvjPYXALTbW7iHtN5vYh8BKREItoHADkQdglc1Mbb1vqmAEeFpt6vA-CpEM3uvcKM/s320/from+new+iphone+064.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="color: #e69138; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></div>
Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-57670882689059205022016-03-07T10:31:00.000+10:302016-03-07T10:36:13.381+10:30Don't be ashamed of being a victim.Hi all,<br />
An interesting topic, why be ashamed of being a victim of abuse?<br />
For one reason, it wasn't your fault!<br />
I know when I started to share publicly what happened to me as a child , my family told me to move on, plenty of other people said the same or just pretended it didn't happen.<br />
When I felt the best was when people validated me very rare though it was. I think this is particularly because I never had been before. The abuse happened as a child and I was not validated, that child still lives in me now waiting for some kind of validation and justice. Yes I have to do the work now but if you want to help a survivor , validate them don't tell them to move on.<br />
Validation will help with healing, telling them to move on will slow it down.<br />
<br />
Please read the article in the link below, it was shared with me and I want to share it with you as it really resonated!<br />
<br />
"Sanctuary for the abused"<br />
<u>Reality and re victimization</u><br />
<br />
<a href="http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com.au/2005/09/reality-and-revictimization.html" target="_blank">http://abusesanctuary.blogspot.com.au/2005/09/reality-and-revictimization.html</a><br />
<br />
Let us be gentle with each other and validate each other's pain , this will make such a loving and healing place to be.<br />
<br />
Love and light,<br />
Margie Thomas xxx<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc6Gn3_xVBtaWX-vIvYR0MU48HV7MSMcEim878pKQHfmW52XLD9fkSo_q5cS-toZ_5E4ERNcqtTabRqNFXirJEGLFB5HtM-u6_cyO9lAOIusXeS7hmvnWF91P83qkINH58FCXtjPLzSYM/s1600/Belair+for+Paul+043.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhc6Gn3_xVBtaWX-vIvYR0MU48HV7MSMcEim878pKQHfmW52XLD9fkSo_q5cS-toZ_5E4ERNcqtTabRqNFXirJEGLFB5HtM-u6_cyO9lAOIusXeS7hmvnWF91P83qkINH58FCXtjPLzSYM/s320/Belair+for+Paul+043.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-55478120653638592242016-03-01T15:37:00.000+10:302016-03-01T15:37:23.344+10:30Place a ribbon in your front yard to honour survivors.<br />
As I said in my last post, in Australia we are currently having a Royal Commission into Childhood sexual abuse in Institutions which include churches. At the moment they are interviewing Cardinal Pell an Australian who is now at the Vatican. <br />
<br />
<br />
A friend of mine suggested we all put up ribbons in our front yards or on our local Catholic Church fences to support the survivors of Childhood sexual abuse by the Catholic Church.<br />
<br />
I have done so and encourage others to do the same.<br />
<br />
I also honour all those survivors who will probably never get justice or a royal commission!<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmqPZdmpWdCp73LjGl2v1y73O_p9xWDF_WuApt2T1xl6ma9xY94QaG67VEyeN7aGtzJ7Rc2ohRmnwT7GMx-i_2t8nBOQCmZYQq3DOSAn109WlfFm-l6tnbLiAC_-ElB1j1N6yv5FQ2FMM/s1600/This+ribbon.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmqPZdmpWdCp73LjGl2v1y73O_p9xWDF_WuApt2T1xl6ma9xY94QaG67VEyeN7aGtzJ7Rc2ohRmnwT7GMx-i_2t8nBOQCmZYQq3DOSAn109WlfFm-l6tnbLiAC_-ElB1j1N6yv5FQ2FMM/s640/This+ribbon.jpg" width="480" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
Love and light, </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
Margie Thomas xxx</div>
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-45776800187212055042016-03-01T15:32:00.001+10:302016-03-01T15:32:52.690+10:30Come Home (Cardinal Pell) - Tim Minchin<br />
In Australia we are currently having a Royal Commission into Childhood sexual abuse in Institutions which include churches. At the moment they are interviewing Cardinal Pell an Australian who is now at the Vatican. <br />
<br />
It has triggered and saddened so many survivors to see people like him hide the truth. He was meant to come to Australia for the interviews but he said he was too sick. There were doctors who offered to fly with him and take many small trips so it would not wear him out but he refused. I think his nickname will be "NO TELL PELL".<br />
<br />
Tim Minchin even wrote a song asking Pell to come home. All the profits paid for the survivors to fly to Rome to watch him being interviewed. . Here is a link to the song. You can purchase it on I Tunes. I bought it as soon as I heard it.<br />
Love and light, Margie Thomas<br />
<br />
PS Thank you Tim Minchin on behalf of all survivors of Childhood sexual abuse! You ROCK!<br />
<br />
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="270" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/EtHOmforqxk" width="480"></iframe>Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-10250149716364398032016-02-21T15:13:00.001+10:302016-02-21T15:13:41.656+10:30Sharing an article by Coral Anika Theill.... the history of patriarchy... fascinating!<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;">Hi All!</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;">Author </span><a class="profileLink" data-hovercard="/ajax/hovercard/user.php?id=1170791976" href="https://www.facebook.com/coral.theill" style="background-color: white; color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px; text-decoration: none;">Coral Anika Theill</a><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;">, has written a very interesting article about the history of patriarchy from church and government up till today.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;">It seems history keeps repeating.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;">This woman has been through so much and I find her a wonderful inspiration as a survivor of Childhood sexual abuse.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.32px;">Please read...</span><br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.coralanikatheill.com/#!Horror-of-Family-Court-Religion-Burning-Witches/c1q8z/56c89e610cf2de8a479220e0" target="_blank">http://www.coralanikatheill.com/#!Horror-of-Family-Court-Religion-Burning-Witches/c1q8z/56c89e610cf2de8a479220e0</a><br />
<br />
She also suggest a lot of wonderful links and authors to check out.<br />
<br />
Please enjoy.<br />
<br />
Love and Light ,<br />
Margie Thomas<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj554TRvEVE7RsMZhhm5QGzI1KTtFujR8qReVMpxrdw48Rt2MX-SX0QSZs7ePVqRSODkuvCpy0CvxQW8oEXbqRovZFEHwkoGBve3LxSa1CcokbJeTobPzDNRPLqcf0Ef6D3cLHGXZ_dYGc/s1600/Feb+including+my+51st+birthday+005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj554TRvEVE7RsMZhhm5QGzI1KTtFujR8qReVMpxrdw48Rt2MX-SX0QSZs7ePVqRSODkuvCpy0CvxQW8oEXbqRovZFEHwkoGBve3LxSa1CcokbJeTobPzDNRPLqcf0Ef6D3cLHGXZ_dYGc/s320/Feb+including+my+51st+birthday+005.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-37161823335433180982016-01-25T14:46:00.001+10:302016-01-25T14:46:29.537+10:30That dirty word "Forgiveness".Hi all,<br />
<br />
It has been a while since I have posted.<br />
<br />
As you know I have written before about how a survivor of Childhood sexual abuse (or any other abuse), should not be forced into forgiving their perpetrator.<br />
<br />
I know that it has been a huge thing in our society that we must forgive to move on.<br />
The problem with this is that there is so much focus on that and very little on supporting the survivor and trying to get justice for them.<br />
<br />
Hence when a survivor who has held in so much pain for all those years at last gets to release it, let them!<br />
They probably got no support, no justice and no validation as a child. Just because they are now an adult doesn't mean that all those needs suddenly disappear. On the contrary they still need to be dealt with, which includes support, acknowledgment, validation and a chance for some kind of justice.<br />
<br />
I am not alone in this thinking. Forgiveness can be wonderful but healing is much more important. Forgiveness, if there is any, is at the end of the healing process not at the beginning or middle but at the end. You cannot tell someone when their healing journey has ended, only they will know that and unfortunately it can take many years and there will always be scars.<br />
<br />
So stand by a survivor, imagine what you would do if the atrocity had just happened , what would you do then?<br />
<br />
I would like to share an article that I found that also reinforces what I have been saying for years now. This is by <span style="color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant: inherit; font-weight: inherit; line-height: inherit;">Anastasia Pollock, LCMHC for Goodtherapy.org</span><br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/why-i-dont-use-the-word-forgiveness-in-trauma-therapy-0120164" target="_blank">http://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/why-i-dont-use-the-word-forgiveness-in-trauma-therapy-0120164</a><br />
<br />
While I am at it, as a survivor 'Grief' is a huge thing, which most people don't seem to realise. I have found Tim Lawrence has a great handle on it and would recommend his site for some great advice and encouragement.<br />
The Adversity Within:<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.timjlawrence.com/blog/" target="_blank">http://www.timjlawrence.com/blog/</a><br />
<br />
So hoping you got through the Holiday season OK, as I know it can bring a lot of pain with it. I say well done for still putting one step forward, you are courageous and wonderful!<br />
Love and light,<br />
Margie Thomas<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNCzOVBCe6iM2YOcClUW07Vf0gBWGpjEZdHoNCEJnA8loDxe2iG2C0saRCgjkY6BRXjK7JUW2slzEb-YpjsfdSxXx0SUS5hEyvR-QYHeuR93JBURkwmZLm4PwYvWj3kpOILSLEchkuoXU/s1600/August+2015+225.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNCzOVBCe6iM2YOcClUW07Vf0gBWGpjEZdHoNCEJnA8loDxe2iG2C0saRCgjkY6BRXjK7JUW2slzEb-YpjsfdSxXx0SUS5hEyvR-QYHeuR93JBURkwmZLm4PwYvWj3kpOILSLEchkuoXU/s320/August+2015+225.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-27807231491444799282015-11-03T10:10:00.000+10:302015-11-03T10:10:44.456+10:30An article about grief and how important it is!Hi all,<br />
It has been a long time since I have written.<br />
<br />
Life can get busy some times with things other than dealing with healing. Good things and not so good things pop up in life.<br />
<br />
In general it has been good except for the loss of a long time friend of my sons who was murdered. My heart goes out to his family and friends.<br />
<br />
This article I am showing a link to, is brilliant when it comes to grief. As a survivor of Child sexual abuse I thought it was wonderful as I have had all the crap thrown at me too like "It all happens for a reason"..... I always thought BULLSHIT when I heard that!<br />
<br />
This article resonates with my beliefs beautifully, please check it out!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.timjlawrence.com/blog/2015/10/19/everything-doesnt-happen-for-a-reason" target="_blank">http://www.timjlawrence.com/blog/2015/10/19/everything-doesnt-happen-for-a-reason</a><br />
<br />
If you are going through grief or loss at the moment, I send you hugs and may you have friends who can "sit" with you.<br />
<br />
Love and light,<br />
Margie Thomas<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgStquvJxgz4TjBP_sXW0QXIWmoXxxyJSQ-DbEGr8PxDmFMmuQGqJV-9UdsvoJge_tgdUrI1mAwcdLILkaCi5EA45tj-pmUm9G2pUPPCknVA3UuP0p_jt6resC-bnVQT7tkFIT7sg-cIAE/s1600/October+15+135.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgStquvJxgz4TjBP_sXW0QXIWmoXxxyJSQ-DbEGr8PxDmFMmuQGqJV-9UdsvoJge_tgdUrI1mAwcdLILkaCi5EA45tj-pmUm9G2pUPPCknVA3UuP0p_jt6resC-bnVQT7tkFIT7sg-cIAE/s320/October+15+135.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-31031989784398424642015-06-17T20:46:00.000+09:302015-06-17T20:46:25.726+09:30To forgive or not to forgive that is the question...Hi all,<br />
I haven't been on for awhile. I have had a bit of illness but also some good healing time.<br />
<br />
I was on Facebook again the other day and saw this wonderful article on Psychology Today .com.<br />
<br />
As you know I have spoken about forgiveness before and how many survivors are often expected to forgive their perpetrator right at the beginning of their healing journey. I think this is madness and is actually quite harmful to the survivor. You can only forgive when and if you are ready. The focus should not be on the victim doing the 'right thing' but instead should be on the perpetrator doing the 'right thing'!<br />
<br />
Anyway here is a link to the article I was talking about , it backs a lot of what I have already said. So for those of you who need more proof to show others please read this and share.<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/disturbed/201208/why-you-dont-always-have-forgive" target="_blank">https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/disturbed/201208/why-you-dont-always-have-forgive</a><br />
<br />
<br />
Lots of love and light!<br />
Margie Thomas<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNrHWI9n4FJILCWdDkF_B8QMWknkZpMVrH6g3HqejJLhJPJtnX6V64lWBzdWRUYatS9VzaYlcKrHQlaS0AJCVNrqFkxVvIhLgMZhLYMRkc6JGt2nJz-8sqUe8oAwgLEB5HIgN7Jzc8uc4/s1600/Autmn+exquinox+and+more+120.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="224" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNrHWI9n4FJILCWdDkF_B8QMWknkZpMVrH6g3HqejJLhJPJtnX6V64lWBzdWRUYatS9VzaYlcKrHQlaS0AJCVNrqFkxVvIhLgMZhLYMRkc6JGt2nJz-8sqUe8oAwgLEB5HIgN7Jzc8uc4/s320/Autmn+exquinox+and+more+120.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-12059956244559989342015-05-07T20:48:00.000+09:302015-05-07T20:48:17.178+09:30Letting go of family.<br />
Just a quick note, some of you know that I had to cut my family off after having to deal with the effects of child abuse. It was one of the hardest things for me to do.<br />
<br />
Below is a link to an article that may help explain this. If you are in the same situation it may help you to make your decision.<br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.educate4change.com/blog1/-is-it-time-to-divorce-your-family" target="_blank">http://www.educate4change.com/blog1/-is-it-time-to-divorce-your-family</a><br />
<br />
<br />
Breaking away from everything that would not help me was the best thing I could have done. After more than 2 years now I am starting to feel whole and much more at peace. I threw out all my old beliefs and am now on a journey of finding new ones. This time I make the choice to match with what is inside me not what someone else told me to believe.<br />
<br />
I went from wanting to commit suicide to wanting to live!<br />
<br />
Love and light on your journey,<br />
Margie Thomas<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgk0Yo16w9zMZUQCQWVdkgGJ4BZ55jU_Uf4lO_QMF7AL6hZsotC5eL3fCJ-q6uBsdkcaveQxVTILPy8AND2H4gjL7vAfGy1HQVy4rbxh7Qe2xSISdKG8CucG9vLaXX8syYaspXli4mwS24/s1600/Belair+national+park+032.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgk0Yo16w9zMZUQCQWVdkgGJ4BZ55jU_Uf4lO_QMF7AL6hZsotC5eL3fCJ-q6uBsdkcaveQxVTILPy8AND2H4gjL7vAfGy1HQVy4rbxh7Qe2xSISdKG8CucG9vLaXX8syYaspXli4mwS24/s320/Belair+national+park+032.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<span id="goog_571117649"></span><span id="goog_571117650"></span><br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-38836463318856409382015-04-30T10:04:00.003+09:302015-04-30T10:04:57.485+09:30Complimentary copy of "Bonshea Making Light of the Dark"<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Hi all,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">Just wanted to share a link :</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><a href="http://www.coralanikatheill.com/#!read-bonshea-making-light-of-the-dark-/c22am">http://www.coralanikatheill.com/#!read-bonshea-making-light-of-the-dark-/c22am</a></span><br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<img height="400" src="http://static.wixstatic.com/media/f28b6b_7b762a135c0b49969a7cf311a1345c52.jpg_srz_p_216_298_75_22_0.50_1.20_0.00_jpg_srz" width="289" /></div>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<h1 class="font_0" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-stretch: normal; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span class="color_25" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-weight: normal; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: small;">Coral Anika Theill has written a book called "</span></span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span class="color_25" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">BONSHEÁ</span></span> </span></span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Making Light of the Dark"</span></span></span></span></span></span></h1>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">She is now offering a complimentary copy on her website.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">I have purchased the book but have not finished reading it as yet. I follow her on Facebook and find her posts very encouraging and educational.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">She has been through much abuse herself including spiritual and domestic abuse. She has shown an amazing strength and survival that inspires all.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Please check out her link.</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Love and Light </span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border-image-outset: initial; border-image-repeat: initial; border-image-slice: initial; border-image-source: initial; border-image-width: initial; border: 0px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Margie Thomas</span></span></span></span></span></div>
<h2 class="font_2" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; color: #a40606; font-family: Enriqueta, serif; font-size: 40px; font-stretch: normal; font-weight: normal; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-style: italic; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span class="color_25" style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; color: white; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"> </span></span><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-family: arial, 'ms pゴシック', 'ms pgothic', 돋움, dotum, helvetica, sans-serif; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; color: white; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-style: italic; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="background-attachment: initial; background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; border: 0px; font-size: 36px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Making Light of the Dark</span></span></span></span></h2>
Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-69420325554210494912015-02-16T15:30:00.000+10:302015-02-16T15:30:57.171+10:30What happened to compassion?<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">Well hi all,</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">I have just had a milestone birthday by turning 50! </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">It certainly makes you think about life as it seems to go past so quickly!</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">On my journey as a survivor of child sexual abuse I have thought a lot about how my life has turned out. I am grateful for many things but still angry about other things. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">I look at the world in a different way now too.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">I think that being positive is a wonderful thing but being forced to be positive is a terrible thing. In this world of ours people do not tolerate pain in themselves or others. I was raised to think in a fairy tale way, just pray and it will be ok and if it isn't it's either something you've done or the Devils fault. The fact is life is not always ok. There are ups and downs and sometimes extreme ones. We have emotions for a reason, they are telling us when something is wrong or something is good. We need to acknowledge them. Having emotions is not the problem it is what you do with them that matters. The more you push them down the harder they will try to come up.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">As a child you were still developing and if your needs were not met by your parents which in itself is a form of abuse ; then being abused in other ways on top of it your brain cannot develop</span><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"> normally. There are a huge store of emotions that have not been able to come out. As a child the complexity of emotions from abuse is way to big to understand so they are stored till the child is an adult and can then work through them. So you have the pain of years stored needing to come out, in tears, in yells, in grief, in anger and more. Like an over wound spring that you cannot hold tight anymore. That is why as survivors we need professional help and encouragement and not to be told to wind it up again. That is like telling someone who is vomiting to keep swallowing it, disgusting metaphor I know but not far from the truth of telling a survivor to get over it and stop being so negative!</span></span></span><br />
<br />
Like someone who is blind develops amazing hearing to compensate ,so a survivor of Child abuse may not be developed in some parts of the brain but other parts become amazing at adapting. You learn to survive!<br />
<br />
In China many years ago girls had their feet bound so they would always have petite feet and for other cruel reasons to, such as to keep a woman under control as they could not run very fast with feet like that. Imagine if people then got angry with the women as adults and told them to get over it and just run. It is like blaming them for what happened to them which was totally out of their control. Even if the adults who bound the child's feet apologized it will not make the woman's feet go back to normal. I think the perpetrating adult should be made to take responsibility for their actions and pay for the medical bills and support workers that are needed.<br />
<br />
This is what happens to adult survivors of child abuse. Some of the damage is permanent and ALL of it is NOT their fault ! Why is it that most people in our Australian culture seem to have forgotten compassion? I am sure if my feet were bound like the ancient Chinese women's these days I would probably get some help, surgically or physical assistance but as soon as it is not a visible problem the compassion disappears too.<br />
<br />
When there is no real visual evidence to show people a survivor's suffering there is also no compassion. Or the survivor is told to get over it and then ignored. Most survivors are in survival mode and actually, like an animal, will not show you their pain if they can help it. If an animal was treated this way there would be a huge uproar about it (as there should be).<br />
<br />
Instead of forcing someone to feel a certain way how about we start to be empathetic and think about what they are going through. If you were treated as unjustly as most survivors I am sure you would feel just as outraged as they do.<br />
<br />
I have spent most of my life being told how I should think and feel. Now I am 50 I really am not willing to let this continue. I have every right to feel what I feel and think what I think, just as you do. As an adult I must take responsibility for my actions but I am not responsible for other peoples actions. I am not responsible for my perpetrators actions.<br />
<br />
In saying that I will continue to stand up for people who are not being listened to. Of course my passion is survivors of Child sexual abuse. But all injustice goes against my grain. I feel so angry when I see people trying to control others and not respecting them as is our human right. I think if we are to be a great and healthy society compassion and empathy are vital.<br />
<br />
This subtle evil of apathy about others pain has led to some dreadful things. I think the way our government is treating Asylum seekers here in Australia is a good example of that.<br />
<br />
If we are continually going to treat people like objects it will eventually come back to us. How can we grow as a society if money and fear are more important than compassion and justice?<br />
<br />
We need to stop looking for the evidence of suffering and start to listen to the sufferer. Especially when the victim has done nothing to bring the suffering upon themselves. Let us start to treat injustice of people the same way we do for animals! Like the people who hurt animals, the people who hurt other humans need to take responsibility for their actions and if that includes going to jail then that is what they should do! Justice is a vital part of healing for both the victim and the perpetrator. The perpetrator should make amends by paying for the physical and mental health bills etc.<br />
<br />
Below is a statement I fully agree with and many professionals and activists have said the same thing.<br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">"Saying that you can't be healed unless you've forgiven your abuser is like saying that a cut can't be healed as long as visible scar tissue remains. And insisting that an abused person "forgive" their abuser before they are fully healed f</span><span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #141823; display: inline; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">rom that abuse is like insisting that a person skip rope before their broken leg is fully mended. It can only make things worse." - John Shore</span><br />
<span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #141823; display: inline; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
Please think compassionately and lets become a better society that can heal one person at a time.<br />
Say NO to Apathy as that is the biggest evil of our times.<br />
<br />
Much love and encouragement for your journey,<br />
Margie Thomas<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6ywW2HiBlMXrH5JhIO-oci7IPuL3GLVkF9OlXjrefrmHic4WYSmlZpwAdTLU9LF46A3Cr8fht73ASf9W981idYFgG82oJ65A7NlXrcBffLpBMH-Dqvf1a-CS_1B7aJhPtqlI71BvIHUE/s1600/My+50th+001.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg6ywW2HiBlMXrH5JhIO-oci7IPuL3GLVkF9OlXjrefrmHic4WYSmlZpwAdTLU9LF46A3Cr8fht73ASf9W981idYFgG82oJ65A7NlXrcBffLpBMH-Dqvf1a-CS_1B7aJhPtqlI71BvIHUE/s1600/My+50th+001.JPG" height="320" width="213" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-74786530883942328592015-01-27T21:01:00.000+10:302015-01-27T21:01:49.055+10:30Domestic Violence is far from a joke!<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><b>Domestic Violence is far from a joke!</b></span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">I could not believe my eyes when I was reading in my local regional magazine that there was a joke about a man shooting his wife over a misspelt email! In Australia 1 woman a week dies from violent behaviour by a past or current partner. This is not something to joke about. Ask people like Rosie Batty who got Australian of the year for the tireless work she has done to work against Domestic Violence whether she thinks it's funny!</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">It is the acceptance of humor like this that promotes apathy against domestic violence!</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">I hope that they will apologise for such distasteful humor.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">It is standing up for these little things that will make the difference please don't let apathy numb your conscience.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, lucida grande, tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;">Here is a link to Rosie Batty receiving her award:</span></span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 20px;"><a href="http://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-01-25/rosie-batty-named-australian-of-the-year-2015/6045290" target="_blank">http://www.abc.net.au/news/2015-01-25/rosie-batty-named-australian-of-the-year-2015/6045290</a></span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgg2TdqbwtcxuaKKQ1grpowlGUL31_r0fFEZ2dlFuaexKPnQPnaV8BdG2bQSS4hGG-SPg_vS8MWlU4oH9LRY8cdo-HrEuRCeF1Fy1Ziixr_aQ7ZezFUxiJl_UChkC0KZdGtAo2eqYvIMSs/s1600/Belair+national+park+035.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgg2TdqbwtcxuaKKQ1grpowlGUL31_r0fFEZ2dlFuaexKPnQPnaV8BdG2bQSS4hGG-SPg_vS8MWlU4oH9LRY8cdo-HrEuRCeF1Fy1Ziixr_aQ7ZezFUxiJl_UChkC0KZdGtAo2eqYvIMSs/s1600/Belair+national+park+035.JPG" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Love and Light,<br />
Margie Thomas<br />
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-58292129193568015402015-01-27T17:00:00.000+10:302015-01-27T17:00:18.072+10:30Dr Cathy Kezelman - Australia day award.<div align="center">
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="MsoNormalTable" style="border-collapse: collapse; text-align: center;">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td style="padding: 0cm 0cm 0cm 0cm;" valign="top">
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="MsoNormalTable" style="background: white; border-collapse: collapse; mso-padding-alt: 0cm 0cm 0cm 0cm; mso-yfti-tbllook: 1184; width: 600px;">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td style="padding: 0cm 0cm 0cm 0cm;" valign="top">
<div style="line-height: 37.5pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly;">
Here is an email I received today from ASCA. Congratulations to Dr Cathy Kezelman!</div>
<div style="line-height: 37.5pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly;">
Keep up the great work Dr Cathy Kezelman and ASCA!</div>
<b><span style="color: #555555; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 18.0pt; mso-ansi-language: EN-AU; mso-bidi-language: AR-SA; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-fareast-language: EN-AU;"><img height="60" id="_x0000_i1025" src="http://i1.cmail2.com/ei/j/C3/0B9/7B5/144058/csfinal/logo.jpg" style="-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic; border-bottom-width: 0in; border-left-width: 0in; border-right-width: 0in; border-top-width: 0in; display: block; max-width: 227px;" width="200" /></span></b>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="MsoNormalTable" style="border-collapse: collapse; border-spacing: 0; mso-yfti-tbllook: 1184; width: 100%px;">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td style="padding: 0cm 37.5pt 0cm 37.5pt;" valign="top">
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 18.0pt; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly;">
<span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt;">Dear Margaret<br />
<br />
<strong>AUSTRALIA DAY
AWARD</strong><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 18.0pt; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly;">
<i><span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt;">We are thrilled to
announce that ASCA President, Dr Cathy Kezelman, has been appointed a
Member of the Order of Australia. The award was announced on Australia
Day, January 26th 2015.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 18.0pt; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly;">
<i><span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt;">The AM award recognises
Cathy’s service to community health as a supporter and advocate for
survivors of child abuse.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 18.0pt; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly;">
<i><span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt;">The award is a
well-deserved public acknowledgment of her unwavering commitment to
providing hope, optimism and pathways to recovery for the millions of
Australian adult survivors who are living with the long-term effects of
prior trauma and abuse.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 18.0pt; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly;">
<i><span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt;">Cathy is a prominent
voice on the subject of childhood trauma and abuse. As ASCA President,
she has been instrumental in supporting the work of the Australian Royal
Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse and being
an influential voice in many of the roundtables. Under her stewardship
ASCA has grown from a peer support organisation to a national thought
leader - combining the voice of survivors with that of academics,
researchers and clinicians.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 18.0pt; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly;">
<em><span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt;">Congratulations Cathy and
thank you for your role in improving the lives of Australian adult
survivors of childhood trauma and abuse</span></em><i><span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt;"><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody></table>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 9.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><img height="400" id="_x0000_i1025" src="http://i1.cmail2.com/ei/j/C3/0B9/7B5/144058/csfinal/CathyKezelmanAM.jpg" style="-ms-interpolation-mode: bicubic; border-bottom-width: 0in; border-left-width: 0in; border-right-width: 0in; border-top-width: 0in; display: block; max-width: 700px;" width="600" /><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<table border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="MsoNormalTable" style="border-collapse: collapse; border-spacing: 0; mso-yfti-tbllook: 1184; width: 100%px;">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td style="padding: 0cm 37.5pt 0cm 37.5pt;" valign="top">
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 18.0pt; margin-bottom: 18.0pt; mso-line-height-rule: exactly; text-align: center;">
<span style="color: #60666d; font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 11.5pt;">PHOTO:
ABC News. Mazoe Ford<o:p></o:p></span></div>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="line-height: 19.5pt;">
<br /></div>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody></table>
</td>
<td style="background: #D4DDDB; padding: 0cm 0cm 0cm 0cm; width: .75pt;" valign="top" width="1">
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 1.0pt; mso-fareast-font-family: "Times New Roman";"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody></table>
</div>
Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-90645476379662210932015-01-11T19:36:00.001+10:302015-01-11T19:36:33.411+10:30An insight to Margie Thomas's healing journey.<div class="MsoNormal">
<b><u><span style="font-size: 20.0pt; mso-bidi-font-size: 12.0pt;"><span style="color: blue;">Margie’s Healing Journey</span><o:p></o:p></span></u></b></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">What do you see when you look
at me?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">You have heard I am a
survivor of Childhood sexual abuse,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">What does that mean?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Why did I only come out with
the whole story in my 40s?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Why can’t I get over it?<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">These and many other
questions have been asked of me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I often have to explain
myself more times than I want to.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">If you break a leg and
everyone you see asks you how you did it, you get a little frustrated but you
usually get support.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">At least there is evidence
with the cast on your leg and the fact that it will be a good 6 weeks before
you can get back to normal.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">That’s what people want; they
want you to get back to normal. People
don’t like to sit with other people’s pain as it is uncomfortable. They want to fix it. If they can’t fix it
they will blame the person for not doing enough or run away.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I keep telling my story
because I want to break the silence for me and other survivors. Every time
someone reacts badly to it, or ignores it, it hurts like hell inside so I am scared every
time I have to tell it again. But I have to tell it again because it may help
one person!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Being a survivor of family child
hood sexual abuse is obviously different from breaking a leg. It’s like having
your leg removed by someone you love and then told to shut up about it. Then everyone tells you to stop complaining
about it and get over it. If you don’t run it’s your fault.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">People look at me and think I
am fine, and sometimes I am. Not even my
husband who is very close to me can always tell when something is wrong as I
have learned to hide it to survive. I
was taught that I was only worth something if I did things for others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">So it’s a bit like an
iceberg. What you can see is nothing
compared to what is below the surface. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I suffer from Complex
post-traumatic stress which is common with survivors of child abuse. Certain things trigger automatic responses. A
bit like when a soldier who has returned from war jumps when he/ she hears a loud bang or they
might have nightmares about their time in war every night.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">These are some of my
“triggers”:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="color: blue;">*When someone seems to not believe me inside I turn to
total panic because it connects with not being listened to when I disclosed. It
connects with feeling worthless; it connects with betrayal and a lot of
emotional pain. This includes seeing anybody or reference to anybody who knows
the truth but did nothing and in fact continues to see the perpetrator. (A lot
of my relatives)<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="color: blue;">*When something reminds me of my perpetrator, inside
it connects me back to the abuse and I feel like I am a powerless child again.
Terrified and frozen. This can be a smell, a sound, something visual like
someone looking like the perpetrator. It may be a turn of phrase the
perpetrator used. The car they drive, the age, the gender and so the list goes
on .<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="color: blue;">*If anything tips my security balance such as
financial challenges, or a sense of being out of control with what is happening
around me: I just melt down inside and have an anxiety attack. I often want to
kill myself if the pain is too much to bear. My blood pressure rises, I feel
like I can’t breathe and my pulse races. I feel like there is a lion about to
eat me.</span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">This and more can happen in
one day. If I get triggered too many times in a row it takes me days or weeks
to get back on my feet again.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;">At the beginning of this last
break down, I </span><span style="font-size: 19px;">couldn't</span><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> leave the couch, all I could do was cry and want to kill
myself. It took the tiniest thing to absolutely break me to a million pieces.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I can pick myself up quicker
now but it still happens.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Other symptoms I have
regularly are:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="color: blue;">Days with “Foggy Brain” where I cannot think straight
and nothing I can do will help. I
usually try to meditate to ground myself but it is not safe for me to drive or
do anything that takes concentration.<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">There are days I “disassociate” Where I am just not
here in the present, it is different than “Foggy Brain” as I feel like I can
think clearly but I kind of feel nothing and feel like I am floating along.<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Days of pain. I get a lot of pain in my body and often
have terrible headaches which can last for 3 days at a time. I get a lot of
sinus pain and general aches and pains. I have to have regular physio.<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--></span><i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="color: blue;">Days of depression, well that can be weeks/ months of depression.
I am tired but sometimes can’t sleep. I just feel like I cannot go on anymore.
That every step is climbing a mountain and my mind constantly tells me how “Worthless
and Useless” I am. I feel like a burden on society and think I would be better off
dead. They are hard days. To keep fighting to stay alive is exhausting.</span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It has taken me a lot and I
mean a LOT of courage to walk this journey! To connect with any human being
again beside my husband was terrifying, let alone leaving the house!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It is still hard work to
leave the house and mix with others. It takes a lot out of me and I have to
have rest days afterwards. If you saw me when I am out you would probably have
no idea what I was going through.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Being a Survivor of abuse has
some other effects too:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpFirst" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;"> <span style="color: blue;">
</span></span></span><!--[endif]--><i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><span style="color: blue;">Health issues are very common with survivors. I have diabetes type 2, Irritable bowel
syndrome and often suffer exhaustion. The stress that one lives with as a child
causes a lot of stress on the body and lowers the immune system<o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle" style="mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 14.0pt; mso-bidi-font-family: Symbol; mso-fareast-font-family: Symbol;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--><i><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">According to ASCA (Adults Surviving Child Abuse) These
are common feelings that a survivor has:<o:p></o:p></span></i></span></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpMiddle">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
<i><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="color: blue;">“Anxiety, Grief and sadness. Shame, self-blame
and guilt. Alienation, helplessness, hopelessness and powerlessness”</span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
<i><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="color: blue;"><br /></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraphCxSpLast">
<i style="line-height: 15pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="color: blue;">I can certainly attest to
this!</span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background: white; line-height: 15.0pt; margin-left: 36.0pt; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto;">
<i><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="color: blue;"><br /></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="background: white; line-height: 15.0pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<!--[if !supportLists]--><span style="color: blue;"><span style="font-family: Symbol; font-size: 14pt;">·<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal; line-height: normal;">
</span></span><!--[endif]--></span><i><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="color: blue;">It affects me financially, as I can’t
work. I keep trying to work or study but continually have breakdowns due to
exhaustion. So I do not have superannuation, I do not have savings, I do not
have Shares and I have no back up if something goes wrong. My Physical and
mental problems that come from the abuse have stopped me living a fulfilling
life, they have stopped me from being financially independent. All those dreams I had of travelling and many
other dreams are shattered. I am hoping
that with time things will improve but I am not getting any younger.</span><span style="color: #333333;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoListParagraph" style="background: white; line-height: 15.0pt; mso-add-space: auto; mso-list: l0 level1 lfo1; mso-margin-bottom-alt: auto; mso-margin-top-alt: auto; text-indent: -18.0pt;">
<i><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 14.0pt;"><br /></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Now the difference again with
a broken leg which heals in about 6 weeks and what any survivor suffers is that
it is for life. You get better at dealing with out the leg that was taken but
it is never going to come back.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">So why did I only come out
with the whole story in my 40’s? <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Studies have shown that
either another trauma will re trigger everything that happened or just being in
a stage of life where your mind has the time and safety to be able to start
letting it all out. In our teens we don’t
talk about it, in our 20’s we are busy looking for partners maybe a career or
having children. In our 30’s we are usually busy with children and work. Once
we hit our 40’s the kids are getting older, there is not as much responsibility
with kids at school. People have often got their house/ mortgage on the way and
the brain starts to remember. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;">Not that mine forgot but I
just </span><span style="font-size: 19px;">didn't</span><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> really feel anything about it.
I knew it was horrible but I </span><span style="font-size: 19px;">didn't</span><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> really FEEL all the feelings that I
had locked inside me since childhood. It hit me like a bomb when it decided it
was time to come out! I had no choice but to let it happen. There was no point fighting it but instead I
got help to go through with the healing process. Imagine a truck hits you and
pushes you a long for a ride, you don’t know how long it is going to take, in
fact you feel like it will never finish and the truck will run you over and
kill you but it </span><span style="font-size: 19px;">doesn't</span><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> it just keeps pushing you along and all you can do is
hang on and go with it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">So you cannot fix me but you
can sit with me and believe me, support me and love me. I am doing all the hard
work because I have to, nobody can fix me but me. If I have cut someone out of
my life it is because they were destructive to my healing. It is hard enough on
my own without someone dragging me back!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I won’t say no to people who
want to walk beside me and encourage me and tell me I am doing a great
job. Every bit helps.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14pt;">The bit that is the hardest
is when someone is convinced they are helping me but </span><span style="font-size: 19px;">aren't</span><span style="font-size: 14pt;">. How do I tell them
I can’t be around them when I know their heart is in the right place but I am
not strong enough to be with them yet? Particularly religious people who think that all I need to do is pray and it will get better!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I have spent my whole life
being there for others, to heal I HAVE to take care of ME. It is the ONLY way
forward.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">So next time you meet a
survivor that discloses to you, remember it took them a LOT of courage to tell,
remember to listen to them, believe them and support them as best you can. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It might cause you some pain
for a while listening to something that is so horrible but at least you don’t
have a life sentence because of it as they do!<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Love and Light,</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Margie Thomas</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgk3nJWTapSUAsrCms_y7X_DjElSz5cD0uKQTFj184KO0D3PagqyaDbwD4SFHq1rIqUSU_zmbZq-TAa_r7r6Q13NXhO5adlipNMj4pkheZulPTD1c4laKFvqe86EuqUBNJYPLZD5cT8cRI/s1600/Chookaloo+005.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgk3nJWTapSUAsrCms_y7X_DjElSz5cD0uKQTFj184KO0D3PagqyaDbwD4SFHq1rIqUSU_zmbZq-TAa_r7r6Q13NXhO5adlipNMj4pkheZulPTD1c4laKFvqe86EuqUBNJYPLZD5cT8cRI/s1600/Chookaloo+005.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-27644365432475747832014-12-29T14:00:00.000+10:302014-12-29T14:00:17.378+10:30Time to do something positive with that anger.<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.3199996948242px;">Last night there was a programme about the Daniel Morcombe case. I did not watch it because I forgot. There are many people out there who have responded in absolute anger about the lack of justice against the perpetrators not by the police but by the justice system. I agree as I know first hand. What I want to point out though is that you could use your anger to do something about it. Write to your local MP. Otherwise there are about one third of our population who are survivors and have no support or very little. So instead of giving the perpetrators all of the attention why not support a survivor who has a life sentence of pain because of the perpetrator and then gets told 'to get over it'. Just something for you to think about.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.3199996948242px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.3199996948242px;">Here is a link to the Daniel Morcombe site:</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.3199996948242px;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #141823; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 19.3199996948242px;"><a href="http://www.danielmorcombe.com.au/" target="_blank">http://www.danielmorcombe.com.au/</a></span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmbWibUGaoF59Jd217k8hBPHpx4gdNX1YiSVrwwYHm_iJfgaKdTnI-1sxM-Tvc5aWjYKvr2LcL9PWKHjEi87YYZDze783ZbID3qBD56jwRpdeL-BjwUArmKsoxKncCPwc2IyaZgCVBWiQ/s1600/Nov+14+008.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmbWibUGaoF59Jd217k8hBPHpx4gdNX1YiSVrwwYHm_iJfgaKdTnI-1sxM-Tvc5aWjYKvr2LcL9PWKHjEi87YYZDze783ZbID3qBD56jwRpdeL-BjwUArmKsoxKncCPwc2IyaZgCVBWiQ/s1600/Nov+14+008.JPG" height="320" width="240" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Wearing red for Daniel Morcombe day.</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Love and Light on your healing journey,</div>
<div style="text-align: left;">
Margie Thomas</div>
Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6808531988623447725.post-23674813422311239952014-12-20T16:33:00.000+10:302014-12-20T16:33:03.442+10:30Sympathy for a cold!<br />
<br />
Being a survivor of childhood sexual abuse as many of you know causes a lot of pain and suffering which is life long. Yes it eases as you let out the original pain and learn to cope with it.<br />
<br />
I have a small cold. I have warned people so as not to pass it on. Not making a big deal of it but I cannot believe how compassionate people are! "Oh no you poor thing, not just before Christmas!".<br />
<br />
I just spent over 2 years slowly recovering from a break down due to the abuse. Hardly anyone said anything and most people didn't want to know.<br />
<br />
So why is it I get so much sympathy for a cold ( I even had an offer of Chicken noodle soup!) when with the breakdown I was ignored when I really needed support?<br />
<br />
I think it is that most people can only be empathetic if they have experienced what you have gone through. Most people have had colds and they know how annoying it can be when it is a busy time of year.<br />
<br />
So what do we do about it?<br />
<br />
We tell our stories, we educate the public so they can learn to have some kind of empathy. <br />
<br />
I still find it amusing that going in and out of hospital with mental a mental breakdown gets less sympathy than a cold!<br />
<br />
Love and light and encouragement to keep telling your stories and heal.<br />
Margie Thomas<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4ZDHG_D4_x0jHojqDdXlafLZEDQz5hedvN0cHhe__xLb6Uu8IPcH28HpIpTCGYPBRgi-G_UOGcwDXQJHsKezMhb7AISLRmyZjr1m-RaqshcRzylhzaglUTgXUE9qkaA_wVkCwN0AyOjI/s1600/Macarons+and+the+joker!%2B004.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4ZDHG_D4_x0jHojqDdXlafLZEDQz5hedvN0cHhe__xLb6Uu8IPcH28HpIpTCGYPBRgi-G_UOGcwDXQJHsKezMhb7AISLRmyZjr1m-RaqshcRzylhzaglUTgXUE9qkaA_wVkCwN0AyOjI/s1600/Macarons+and+the+joker!%2B004.JPG" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Willow Thomashttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15374566172711907524noreply@blogger.com0